I ran as fast as I could toward the fire.
Admittedly, this isn't saying much when you're pushing through waist deep snow. I felt like a fish flopping on land...covered in icicles.
But, I was determined. Like every great athlete, I kept my mind on the prize. I would get to the fire and feel my toes. They feel like mini rocks tied to my feet, it's terrible.
Next time I face my refrigerator I'll make a point to wear snow boots.
I trudged on. The snow crunched, and slurped at me. It was like a conversation between me and the snow. A quiet conversation, after all, don't avalanches usually happen near mountains?
Zombies, out here? Impossible. I turned around and squinted. There was a long line of red off in the distance.
Is there a Santa Claus club meeting here?
The line of Santas moved closer. They were, in fact, undead Santas.
Luckily, they were slower than me. After a couple steps, they'd fall face first into the snow. Then they'd rise up like the Kraken, with snow covering their beards.
I turned back around, towards the fire and pushed faster through the snow. I could lose them. Panting, I shoved my way through the snow.
Up ahead there was a wall of something in front of the mountain.
They looked like snowmen and snowwomen...with teeth.
I slowed down.
The grinning snow people slid closer.
How was I ever going to get to the fire on the mountain? The mountain--that's it!
I cupped my numb hands to my mouth and hollered.
"I WANT DOUGHNUTS!"
The mountain grumbled and shook. Then, like it was shedding its winter coat, a thick layer of snow tumbled down.
It swept away the snow people. Then, it scooped up me and the Santa zombies and pushed us off miles away.
I was alone when I came up for air. I wiggled out of the snow and started on a new path toward the fire. A path with, hopefully, less hungry creatures.
I'd love to say that my drive and self-preservation propelled me up that mountain, and right now I'm sitting by that warm campfire roasting marshmallows (with feeling back in my toes and fingers). But, I'd be lying. I may lie to my psychiatrist about seeing zombies after graduation, but I would never lie to you.
Now, I'm sitting in a snow footprint that's twice the size of my body.
I rubbed my toes and fingers, trying to warm them up. My teeth chattered like they're trying to chisel the next Michelangelo's David out of air.
Is what it feels like when rich people get their bodies frozen when they die?
I yawned, my eyes closing. Soon I was asleep, dreaming of a lion, a witch, and a doughnut.
Warmth tingled over my feet and hands.
Was I in an oven?
Something furry tickled my nose.
"Achoo!"I opened my eyes.
A white, fluffy furball lay by my nose.
"Eek!" I scrambled away from the blinking ball of fur. "What are you?"
Abominable Snowman, it scratched out in the snow.
Now, I've got a decision to make, should I choose option A or B? Share below in the comments! I'm a sucker for peer pressure, I'll do whichever option is voted for the most.
The little fluffball eyed my mother's locket that's around my neck. I should give this to the creature and befriend her.
I'm STARVING. Who's to say Abominable Snowman soup won't taste good?